The Name Game

Jocee approached me today...

Jocee: "Mommy, how you know my name?"
Me: "Your name? I gave you your name!"
Jocee: "You gave my name for me?? Thanks, Mom!"

(She went on to talk to herself...)
"Mommy gave my name...for me!"

I was taken aback by her gratitude. She was genuinely appreciative. As soon as she said those words, I wanted to correct myself. I wanted to say, "No, Jocee. I only gave you half your name." But I thought that might be too much to understand.

In reality, Ben had chose both their names. He took the responsibility of naming our children seriously, and made sure to be very involved in the process.

Jocelyn Michelle
June 2004
We went on a lot of camping trips during the first summer after we got married. We couldn't sleep one night. Out of boredom, around 2:00am we started talking about baby names. For a boy, we quickly agreed on Michael Joseph (my dad's name). For a girl, I really liked the name Brooklyn. Ben completely disagreed. After a few other suggestions, I asked if he liked any girls names that ended with -lyn.

He thought for a minute, and told me he always liked the name Jocelyn. To him, it was uncommon and feminine. I remember liking it, too. But we couldn't think of a nick-name for it.

August 2006
When we first found out I was pregnant, I started thinking of middle names to pair Jocelyn with. One day I thought of Michelle. Ben loved it immediately, and wouldn't discuss middle names any further. We had figured it out.

November 2006
When we found out this baby was in fact a girl, I really wanted to think of a nick-name for her. I desperately wanted Josie, but Ben wanted Jossy. I got upset one day, and told him that if he wanted to call our baby Jossy, then we'd have to come up with a different name all together.

He then explained that the only reason he wouldn't agree to Josie, was because it looked too much like Jose. And since the dots on his I's can sometimes look like accent marks, he felt he was setting his little girl up for a lifetime of ridicule.
(Not even joking.)

I offered to compromise with a different spelling. We went through a variety of options. When I came up with Jocee, he agreed right away. It was set in stone.


Sophia Leigh
Ben chose this name completely on his own. We started talking about another baby when Jocee was 7 months old. After going through dozens of girls names (no exaggeration), I was about to give up. One day I pulled up a baby name website, and looked at the top 10 girl names for 2006. He pointed to Sophia, and said that he liked it. I was pretty reluctant, but after all of my rejected names, I agreed.

July 2008
After we found out baby #2 was a girl, I wasn't looking forward to choosing a middle name.

I liked...
Sophia Racquel (a flat out no)
Sophia Madelyn ("too French-ish")
Sophia Christine (too close to Christina)
Sophia Elizabeth (Crystal's middle name)
Sophia Emily (I was reminded of Emily. Thanks again, BTW!)
Sophia Elise (too similar to Alyse-another option for a first name)

And then I gave up! At that point I was starting to feel jealous of women who have husbands that aren't as involved as Ben.
I'm not sure how he thought of Leigh, but I was just happy that he made a decision.


In Short:
While Ben may have annoyed me at the time, I adore the concern that he had for our little girls. When they are old enough, I will tell them this story. They will know that Daddy loves them. They will know that Daddy was mindful of them before they were born, that he is still mindful of them, and that no earthly circumstance will ever change that.